Pesmerga's Room (Permanent Thread)

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko's dull blue orbs stayed on Pesmerga as he spoke, explaining his magical abilities. So that's what it is. It is indeed convenient. Very convenient. She had known that he can shapeshift, obviously due him doing so many times, but the fact that he can alter the sizes of objects? That she definitely did not think about. She had thought he can somehow transform or create things from his imagination or something as such. She supposed she was a little off, but either way, she supposed it didn't matter much.

Anyway, her eyes soon wandered off slowly towards the fireplace as she stared at the gently burning flame. The red and orange of the fire burned into her eyes as the light reflected off her blue orbs. Of course, all the while, she was listening to him speak still, and eventually hard him ask her a question regarding what she does.

Someone else had asked her the same question before, and she had answered by demonstrating, but then again, it was really only because of some interruptions. Either way, she returned her attention back towards Pesmerga as she parted her lips to speak out.

"I'm an elementalist." she replied quietly. "Water and ice only." she finished after a short pause. It seems like her elemental magic abilities fit her personality perfectly. Calm, peaceful yet aggressive and cold when needed. Maybe it's one of the traits that caused her to be like this? Did her powers genetically affect her since birth? Nah, she doubts it. It's not like her parents are like this. Well .... most of the time anyway. At any rate, Yukiko soon shoved the thought aside.

[Pesmerga]

"Water and ice huh, very versatile. With practice you can do a lot with that, even burn people worse than fire."

He was curious about her which was weird for him since he the lives of everyone else were like a blink of an eye for him.

"So when did you first realize you could manipulate it?"

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko thought for a bit before replying. Of course, she really didn't have to think about it at all, since her magical abilities are genetically inherited to her since birth, meaning that she had had these powers since she was born. She had followed this controlled blood line, being the fifth descendent of Chall. She smiled mentally at the thought of the name. Why couldn't she use her own real name? She knew the answer perfectly well, but she just couldn't help feeling somewhat unhappy about it, even if she had been using the name Yukiko for quite some time now. Nonetheless, she had kept her facial expression straight the whole time, never revealing anything on her face. Same old emotionless state.

"This ability was passed down to me genetically. I've had the ability to utilize ice and water since birth." she answered, her voice low and quiet as usual. It was no big deal actually, letting someone know of this. Many people had controlled lines of magical abilities. And because she belongs to one, she's not a full elementalist, for she can only create and control ice and water. She might have the ability to learn the other elements, but it will most likely prove to take a lot of time. Plus, ice and water is basically enough for her, despite training with those elements day and night when she was younger. She definitely did not get bored. Who knows why?

At any rate, Yukiko paused as she glanced back towards the fire. Shortly after, she spoke again, this time asking a question, surprisingly. "And you?" she asked softly, her tone monotoned. It seemed more like a statement than a question, but either way, she is asking him about it.

[Pesmerga]

He was not too surprised by her answer, too many times before mages were bred, in his eyes this was wrong. Magic was too much a burden on people to be dropped on them before they are even conscious of the world. Then she asked him a question out of the blue. It caught him by surprise but was welcome none the less.

"Me huh, well I'm not entirely sure. I believe I was born with my abilities but I belonged to a race like that. I met very few others like me during that time but from what I gathered we had a loose net civilization. It wasn't easy since we were all in different forms most of our lives. Compared to how I was millions of years ago I see my mental capacity as being exponentially greater then it was so I wonder if that is how all those of my race were. All my chances to find answers were wiped out in the extinction at the end of the Jurassic period though."

He began to stare out the window at the midday sun as clouds began to roll in.

"Sometimes I do wonder though, I have no natural gender, I require no food, water, or air. At times the form I am in may take control over that, for instance without food in this form the muscle tissue becomes weak. I am pretty good at controlling it but not perfect yet. Once I was killed, during the crusades. I was burned alive. It was strange, even when my body was gone the magic smoke that consumes me wandered for around 100 years before I took form again. Strange."

He stared out the window again pondering his recent words.

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko said nothing as she listened carefully to his words. It was interesting what he said. So he possess his powers due to being part of an almost extinct race? Wow. She never imagined that he was that old, since his human form looks nothing like it of course, though she can't say she was too surprised, neither did she show any expression on her face either, like usual.

Soon, she spoke out quietly, just words of acknowledgement. "I see." Plain and simple.

Anyway, she paused, and remained silent afterwards as he continued on. She followed his gaze for a short moment before returning her gaze back towards the fire in the fireplace. She gave a slight nod, acknowledging all that he said. She really has nothing to say at the moment actually, for she was rethinking all that he said, sorting everything out.

[Pesmerga]

Her words were as simple as could be and Pesmerga broke his monologue hoping to not bore her. He sat for a few moments recalling things in the past and noticed an uncomfortable silence had beset the room. With the exception of the fire crackling a pin drop could be heard.

"So uh, how long you been here at the academy?"

It was the only thing he could squeeze out.

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko personally did not mind the silence of course, but then again, it's just because she's usually surrounded by nothing but silence. She felt fine with it, comfortable too, one may say. Let's just say she's not one who's fond of a lot of loud noises, so the tone throughout the entire conversation had been great for her.

Anyway, she soon heard his question as she glanced at him slightly, sideways. She thought fo a bit. Actually, she can't quite remember anymore, but it was about two weeks ago ... or at least she thinks so. So that's exactly what she answered. "Approximately two weeks I suppose." she responded in her same usual voice. "You?" she asked back, just to be polite.

[Pesmerga]

"Oh two weeks huh, yeah about the same for me."

He started to think back to when he first got here.

"Yeah I'm not too sure I should be here, I kinda just tagged along after the fight in the desert and shifted into the lady at registration and gave myself this room. Whatever though. Why did you decide to come here?"

He hoped to get the conversation going, entertaining guests wasn't his forte so it was time to work on it.

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko kept her blue empty eyes on Pesmerga as she listened to what he said. So he came around the same time as her huh? She remembered back to the time she first seen him. At the desert battle with all those beasts. He came during the middle on the battle, which had proved to be beneficial for their forces.

Anyway, Yukiko parted her lips once more as she spoke out, acknowledging his reason for being here. "I see."

Soon, she would hear the question, and once agian, she spoke out, answering his question. "My parents sent me here ..." she started, pausing before continuing. "to learn more about my powers as well as improving my control over them." she finished, her voice low and quiet.

[Pesmerga]

Pesmerga felt kind of bad for her, she was breed for a purpose and given no real free will. Without being able to blend in with the chaotic nature of things and do what one wants to do with no apparent reason.

"Hm, control your powers more, did you ever have an uncontrollable outburst of your powers,"

He leaned forward interlocking his fingers in front of his face,

"a moment where your whole being was defined by raw emotion that in turn fed your magical nature? When the lines between order and anarchy blur and you let it take over?"

His words were sharp and intended to penetrate her psyche and release memories where her id took over. Thos were the moments Pesmerga felt we were our true selves, not what we show to the rest of the world.

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko stayed silent as Pesmerga spoke out, asking her if she had experienced the outburst of uncontrolled powers. She looked away slightly, once again staring at the burning fire. Memories poured into her mind as she heard this. It was an accident. It was all an accident. She didn't mean to kill Koori; she had no choice. She didn't want that to happen, but it did anyway. It wasn't even exactly because of the inability to control her powers at that time. She could control it, but she couldn't quite control perfectly the amount of damage it can cause at that time. She never thought that she could Koori with that attack. She hadn't thought it was strong enough, neither did she ever consider that she would panic and lose herself at that moment. What happened anyway? Just .. what happened? Even now, everything is a blur to her. It was clear, and always haunting her, but yet, everything is a blur. She did not wish to remember this, but she also knew she has to.

She was crying mentally, yet showing nothing on the exterior. Her eyes turned colder as she couldn't help but despise herself at that moment.

Anyway, that's not the only time she lost control. It might have been the only time her feelings actually showed and took over. The first time she shed a tear after the infant stage. But it's not the only time her powers got out of control. Personally, even she herself cannot imagine the full potential of her powers. There are obviously still undeveloped powers within her abilities, some appearing out of nowhere, while others are waiting to be called out. This is another reason why she chose to stay away form others. She doesn't want to feel even more guilty for hurting another individual. It might not be enough to kill them, but it might as well. It's a fifty fifty chance, and Yukiko will never know when it will happen. Now what's the ability that she can't control at the moment? Coldness. Sometimes, if someone touched her, extreme coldness and chills might be sent to the other individual without Yukiko herself knowing it, and Yukiko will never know when this will happen either. This is one thing she's learning desperately to control.

Anyway, she had stayed quiet for some time now. Might as well give her answer, right? "Partly." she stated simply. She did not wish to say anymore, for that was enough. She didn't lose control completely. It was .. an accident.

[Pesmerga]

Pesmerga was quiet as the girl seemed to lose herself in her thoughts. He could see the answer as hard as she tried to hide it. He let a smile slip his face though and said,

"You have to admit, the feeling was exhilirating, regardless the devastation. Sometimes we acidentally harm those we don't mean to, but it all serves as a lesson to ourselves, to show that while we have great abilities, the burden is just as great. You seem to carry grief over such an event, you needn't do that. Eventually you will get to the point you will be able to control that power and harness the feeling and the rush and will realize that event needed to happen to prove to yourself what you are capable of so you have a point to strive for, whether it's to not allow that to happen again or to cause it purposly, to each his own I guess."

He began to drift into space again,

"Sometimes you discover great things by letting go once in a while..."

[Neiro Yukiko]

Yukiko listened to his words carefully as the young girl kept her eyes on the fire burning in the fireplace. It was easier said than done. She had said the same thing to herself, and she knew it as well. But thinking it doesn't necessarily mean you can actually do it. She had thought she can, but she had overestimated herself. Koori was too important to her for Yukiko to let go of that easily. Yukiko is probably closer to Koori more than to her own parents, or let's just say, she was the only one she was ever close to. No one else can replace her, and nothing can make her forget her.

But of course she knew this wasn't the point whether she should forget or not, it's about using it as experience, right? Yes she knew, but it means nothing to her. A good lesson? Not really. A horrible one indeed. It might have taught her about her about the usage of magic, but it had also taught her to never let anyone else get close to her that easily.

And, harness that power? No one in this world can forever harness their powers completely and perfectly. It's impossible. No matter how controlled the powers are, they're magic. It will always have the probability to backfire on the user. Was this the reason why magic creates chaos on Earth? She sighed mentally at the thought. Sure it showed her what she's capable of, but she would rather not know than to sacrifice someone whom she would even die for.

Nonetheless, she understood fully what he's trying to say, but at this point, it means nothing to her. She doesn't care if he figured it out. It didn't matter to her. She had discussed this many times with her own family, and everytime she wanted to say something, she knew she couldn't. Talking back wasn't allowed, and she knew there was no point. Her family were too strict and uncaring for these supposedly 'small' issues, or so in their minds, to care about it, so what was the point of Yukiko explaining and creating an argument in her family? She felt no need to. No love. No purpose when she's with her family, so maybe it is a good thing she came.

Anyway, she finally spoke out. "Some things ... are easier said than done. Perhaps you are right, but perhaps you are wrong." she said plainly, her tone of voice low and quiet, monotoned, showing no emotion of any kind. "One ... can never be able to control and harness their powers completely. When that day comes when someone can do so, it might mean the end for everyone else." she finished slowly, saying her words carefully. What she said can be true, or it can be invalid, but at the moment, it wasn't one of her concerns.

[Pesmerga]

Pesmerga started to let out a bellowing laugh that lasted for a few seconds.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh at you, what you've been through, or where you come from but rather the leaps and bounds you seem to have made in the previous minutes. You see, you now admit that I may be right and I may be wrong, also that complete control could possibly be the end of existence for everything else. Having said that you understand the repercussions of our actions as well as our very existence and while it may have taken a painful experience to show that to you it is best that it happened. Whatever it was was something that only you know of and understand and is not for me to try and guess but should you ever feel the need to talk about it, I'll listen."

He also took note of the way she spoke, so simple and strict.

"Also, not to undo the training and teachings you have went through, you are no longer at home and can carry yourself in whichever manner you choose. While it seems you were brought up and molded from the start, it is time for you develop yourself. You said your abilities were passed down from generation to generation, so at some point it had to start and that person wasn't hand crafted, and neither are you."

[Neiro Yukiko]

((ooc: I hate it when it logs me out while I was typing the post ... >.> so ... my post was lost ... and now I have to start over again. xD I don't even know what I posted just a minute ago lol ... it was so long too >.> blehh so I'll shorten it! xD))


Yukiko said nothing as she listened to his words after he laughed. Personally, she didn't quite know what he was laughign about until he explained, though she can't say it affected her in any way. She just wasn't someone who would care much. Maybe because it wasn't something too important.

Anyway, she listened to what he said carefully as she glanced at him slightly from the side. What he said made her think though. Not whether how she should change and how she would change, but rather what she would have been like if she wasn't brought up in such a family. She wasn't sure, but she supposed it didn't matter. She was shaped into being ilke this by her surroudings. She is herself, and this is how she will be now. She was so used to it, that it's a part of her to act like this, neither does she wish to change in any way actually. She's fine with how she is, but then again, being brought up like this since birth has an impact on something like this, no?

Yukiko frowned mentally. She may be free to do whatever she wishes to in this academy, being away from her parents, but does she really want to get rid of her antisocial and emotionless self? She can't say she does. And she doubts she will change much, even if people changes gradually eventually. In her case ... who knows? No one will until it happens, no? So for now, she doesn't intend to continue thinking about it. It wasn't necessary.

She has nothing to say still, for what she has in mind is not important. She doesn't have the urge to say something when it's unimportant. And so, she remained silent, her attention now back to the fireplace once more, for some reason.